Month: April 2015

Making money feels so good

It’s amazing how life feels so much more wonderful these days, because my silicone wedding rings are doing well! It’s like being in love. Not as adrenalin filled but feels more down to earth.

I woke up this morning here in Victoria at 7am. Enjoyed the chirping of the birds, the sun, the greenery outside of my room, the morning air, the comfy douvet, my smooth skin, the idea that mom is healthy and will make me lots of food today. I feel great! I feel, life is good! And I haven’t felt that in a long time. I pray to God that this lasts, expands, grows into something that is dependable.

I notice that I’m afraid to get my product out and advertise. I do a lot of analytical work: analyze the buyer locations, improve my listing, planning etc. These are important too, but I need to reach out more, get my product known. I think temporary launch discount is ok.

I feel less of an urge to care about other things, like bow ties and Alopecia Channel. But I think that’s expected. When people fall in love, they can’t be as good of a friend, as focused at work, etc. I hope I’m not to be blamed. Part of me worries about being punished for not doing a good job with AC. AC is not racking up a ton of followers. None actually. I need to let it ride for now. Keep doing my videos, and improve along the way.

I’m really happy. I’m really happy about the potential of actually making lots of money this year. I think $100K is no problem, but I’m aiming for $1M. It’s been done, for sure!!

:))))))

Yesterday I got my 3rd review and got 11 sales! The most so far! I’ve sold 70 rings in 12 days, with just one AzonLaunch and giving away rings to 5 top reviewers. So I’ve made over $1000 from the rings! Of course, I’ve spent around $6K to get to this point, haha. Still, extremely happy.

Amazon Launch Tomorrow

I just watched the movie The Fault in Our Stars. Omg, such an awesome movie. What I love the most about it is Ansel Elgort’s character and his performance.

If a guy like Augustus Waters exists in real life, someone who loves me this much and is full of original ideas and has a charismatic personality and is pretty handsome, his lack of one leg is not an issue at all. He is such a beautiful character. So beautiful.

And Ansel Elgort is such a great actor. Such a natural actor. Not the most handsome, but definitely attractive.

Does a man like that really exist? Sigh. I wish to find a great love one day….

For now, I want to focus on making millions!!!

My silicone rings have arrived at Amazon! I think they are still processing them. I have the pictures photoshopped and ready to upload tomorrow. I’m nervous! I hope they’ll do well. I have a good feeling about them.

I think it’ll take me all day tomorrow to get the listings ready. Today I spent all day preparing the photos. I think they will stand out because they are different. The quality isn’t superb but it’s better than my competitors. I’m trying to be speedy….though a big part of me likes to be thorough…I’m still figuring out a balance.

My heart is pounding about this launch. My future depends on it! I know if it doesn’t do well I’ll just try again…but I’m so sick of failing. Please, my dear God. Please let me win this time. Please.

Mega Depressed

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, the past several days.

Well, yesterday was more ok. I was fairly productive, and I only cried when I watched Malificent.

But today was hell. I woke up naturally at 8, but didn’t feel like working out. I was slow and unproductive. Watched a bunch of youtube videos. Felt just sad in general. I think I dreamt about something sad but trivial, like, a water leak in my bag.

Cyndi texted me to say she wants to take me on a mini adventure next week. That made me extra sad. Two weeks after my birthday? Seriously? I wasn’t as mad at her before that offer.

I tried to not be sad about it, because that seemed unreasonable. But I balled my eyes out. I hated feeling like I’m at the bottom of all priorities. I thought about how to respond to that, but in no way did it feel right. Just like with Summer. I just felt so so sad. And so tired as a result. So I took a nap in Vanthony’s bedroom. They have a very comfortable memory foam bed.

What is pissing me off here? Well, that I’m not a priority in her life by any means. The gesture is nice, but it’s two weeks after my birthday, bitch. I know what else she is doing – dating, and dating.

What makes it worse is that I don’t feel right voicing the fact that I was hurt. If I do, it’ll only damage our friendship even more. We already had all these “talks” after our trip from Thailand. I was already hurt. It’ll seem like I’m just so frigging sensitive and fragile and I’m always hurt.

If I knew what’s going on that takes up her time, then maybe I won’t feel as bad. For example, if they are important things instead of dating. If she were to let me know that she has lots going on but she’ll make it up to me later, then that’s better. But it was just so thoughtless.

It’s tough to be me….I tried to have no expectations of people. I make no demands. You’d think that I won’t get hurt that way…but surprisingly people can still hurt me. They’d invite me to shitty things, or things that are an after thought.

I don’t know how to feel happy. I don’t know how to avoid getting hurt. I don’t know how to have friends.

I don’t know how to make money either. I’ll do my best though.