I’ve decided to distance myself from Masha.
I think she intentionally or unintentionally makes me feel worse.
I often feel weird about her. I often feel worse after hanging out with her. It’s just not worth it for me.
I don’t need this in my life.
Recently she suggested that John’s health is getting worse because he is consciously or unconsciously using it as a way to keep us together.
Wow.
What an offensive thing to say.
I could rebuttal in so many ways.
Did your son consciously or unconsciously rape a girl to get your attention because you’ve been neglecting him throughout his teenage years because you’re so fucking selfish?
—
I honestly think she is trying to be offensive because she was jealous that John helped me make over $1 Million. I could see her unease when I told her that, because she stuttered when she tried to say the next thing.
She wasn’t happy for me or him. She was never happy for me.
She said, But you haven’t sold it yet right?
—
One thing I learned from John is that we can all thing so differently.
So maybe she didn’t have ill intentions. Maybe she is projecting like she said she might be.
But the fact is, she often makes me feel bad.
She kept saying how great Dylan was, as if trying to convince herself or trying to make me feel bad because that’s one thing I don’t have – a boyfriend with spare cycles for affection. Also, I don’t like Dylan. He was rude (scrolling his phone while we were all together) and unfunny when I invited him over for dinner.
I just feel that we both have disdain for each other. Maybe I feel it more towards her. After all, she does wear my rings all the time haha.
I appreciate that she let me say with her when I needed it. I appreciate that she is very free of drama.
I just don’t feel a lot of benefits of being around her in general. No happy feelings.
She actually doesn’t get my jokes. She doesn’t give me compliments. I don’t give a lot either, but even I give a lot more than she does! And there’s something competitive going on.
I’m always nice to her in my words. I don’t “subtle stab” her. I don’t plant negative seeds in her. Even though I don’t like Dylan, I don’t plant ideas that could worsen their relationship.
I could very well say to Dylan, Masha thought you were a loser when she first started dating you. (She joked that she learned to attract/date losers from me. It was another time that she was incredibly rude.)
I can’t think of having a good time with her. We had talked a lot. I guess that’s kind of a good time. But lately I find her very uninteresting and judging with her “knowledge”. “Oh adrenal fatigue doesn’t exist, it’s been proven.” “Oh that’s a dopaminergic behaviour.” Sooo annoying.
I have archived her in Whatsapp.
I’m so mad I don’t want to see her messages or listen to them….and I really won’t miss her.
The only reason why I don’t want to clearly end it is that it was my pattern and I don’t want to do it again. Considering the help she had given me before, I won’t say harsh things to her.
I’ll just say to her that I don’t appreciate her planting negative ideas in my world, and her lack of tact. She could’ve said, John can benefit from counselling to feel more positive and less PCS discomfort. But she chose to attack him.
I have never said one negative thing to her about Dylan, even though I don’t like him.