Kent, Felix and I went seal snorkeling on Thursday! Fred came along but didn’t get on. The baby seals were adorable. They are curious and don’t know what personal space means. One poked at my GoPro! One bumped into me and I almost lost my GoPro haha.
We came back and ate some seal food at Camps Bay. Mussels, salmon, prawns. It was alright. I don’t like Camps Bay as much because we got sand blasted on the beach that time. I think that’s where I first met Sam though. Quite sure.
We went to the Milton House after, as Robert was doing the skillshare in Blockchain and music synthesis. It was quite fun. Sam was there. But so was Michelle. Her presence makes me uncomfortable. She’s always been nice to me, but she also gives off a weird vibe. Like she doesn’t like me. And she is not funny at all.
Robert and Sam were playing video games. Ashley went home for a bit. I went home to do online check-in with Berta. But we were too late and didn’t get to sit together for our flight to London.
Everyone was going to dinner at the Kloof Street House. I wasn’t hungry so I wanted to go later.
Sam showed up while I was packing. He looked nice in his white dress shirt and pale blue jeans and light grey shoes.
He saw my empty luggage and wondered if he’d fit. Haha. I laughed as I filmed him. He tried but didn’t get close.
I asked if I can try. I passed the phone to him as he filmed me. I was pretty good at it! I fit all in except my head…I think he tried to pack me in even more. We were both laughing so hard. When I watched the video, it made me happy.
He wanted to try again. He mimicked my approach, and got mostly in too! But the luggage was on its side, so I pushed him over and we both laughed. I joked that I was gonna go take a shower as I zipped him in more…Hahaha.
At dinner, we sat together again. But he was uncomfortable. He turned away from me a bit. And he was quiet. I figured it was because Michelle was at the table. But later he said he was sad. Because this chapter is coming to an end. He asked me to entertain him by showing him videos of him.
He talked to various people at the table, but eventually we’d be talking as if no one was around.
I felt sick suddenly at one point. I got up to go to the washroom and didn’t make it. I threw up three times before I got to the washroom! It was a mess.
A pretty black lady with an afro in the bathroom was really nice. She brought me a ginger ale.
I came back with vomit in my hair. Brittany stepped into my vomit in the bathroom too.
Sam had wanted to go, so Robert, Ashley, Sam and I ubered home.
Ashley was dropped off first. She was gonna fly out the next morning so we hugged goodbye.
We got home. Robert was flying out early. The boys said goodbye.
I felt sick again and threw up at the front door. Wtf! Later on I figured it was the tap water.
I went to clean up a bit, then hugged Robert goodbye. I really like him. I told him that he made this chapter so much better for me.
I then cleaned up my mess downstairs, washed my clothes, and my backpack which I puked on.
I had three imodium but I still shit my pants a little…Twice! Once when I was asleep. Oh my.
I didn’t get to bed til 5:30am. I heard Robert leave.
Told Bunny I was sick and he said just come home and I’ll take care of you. Awww.
Mom was concerned too. But after briefly talking via bad wifi, she said it didn’t sound too bad.
I was fine in the late morning. Went to buy some imodium, bought organic african coffee from Woolworth’s, and went downtown to buy more coffee from Motherland.
Everyone went to the beach then Bungalow. I took it easy and stayed home to pack. I was excited to see Bunny.
I saw Robert’s message in slack. Thanking everyone. I suddenly missed him and started crying.
Rebecca came in to say goodbye, and I was already teared up!
I was finally packed and ready to go out for a bit when people have come back to say goodbye.
Fred and Brian gave me the pickup hug. I hugged Christa and the girls too.
Then Sam emerged from the stairs. He darted into Robert’s room and took his bed.
He came over into my room at one point. Space bunny! He said. He stuck his hands into my rain boots and tried to be funny. He was sad though. It felt a bit weird…Just the two of us. Other people came into my room. I told them that I cried. Sam just quietly watched me.
Later on I went into his room and we talked for a bit. About life, love. He said to keep in touch and keep him posted about me and Alex. He referred to Alex as my husband, cynically I think. I invited him to Vancouver as some of us were talking about having a reunion. He invited me to his birthday in Malagard in Spain.
As we moved our stuff downstairs, he asked if I needed help with my luggage. I joked and asked if he carried it downstairs, would he sneak in the luggage instead. We laughed.
My luggage was heavy and he asked if he was already in it. I said yes I put his doppelganger in there.
Downstairs, I hugged more people goodbye. I was wearing my cute purple top with black shorts, and my black rain boots. Brian loved it and took a photo of me and Sam and Julia.
I hugged Sam goodbye last. Sigh.
Then I cheerily said goodbye to everyone, running to the Uber, then everyone yelled me back cause I forgot my suitcase, ahahaha.
That was a good exodus. I like being cute.
As our Uber drove away, everyone waved at us, and started running after us to eagerly say goodbye. Awwwww.
Sam kept running for like half a block. I air kissed him goodbye.
Michelle tried to record him. I would never understand their relationship. How did he manage to not piss her off with all that he does? How does she manage to not be pissed? She saw me and Sam alone in the two rooms both times. He flirts with me in front of her. It confuses me but it also worries me. What did he say to her to keep her happy? What do they do behind my back?
Something about how he was today made me feel that we have something. Made me feel that I love him. I want to be with him for the rest of my life.
If he just tells me he wants me, I would seriously consider being with him.
But he is 26. I hope that when he is 30, we’d still want each other. I fantasize about being with him one day in the near future. To be deeply in love with each other, and to be together forever.
Of course, I need to let it go, at least for now. While on the plane, Sam was on my mind. But it lessened when i remembered that he fucked at least two women in six weeks, while flirting with me. If I was single and him attached, I wonder if I’d do the same.
In any case…I felt something…And I have never been wrong.
It was a good way to wrap up the chapter! The alone time, that luggage video we recorded of each other, and how we said goodbye. Thank you my dear dear God.