Who would’ve thought that one day at 43 I’d have a crush on an East Indian boy, probably in his late 20s or early 30s lol
Sid came to spikeball a couple months ago. Spikeball was all Asians and Indians and I didn’t really notice him at first.
But then the way he served was so unique, and kinda sexy, I suddenly noticed him! I was like, hold on, this guy is potentially cute!
He didn’t seem interested. When he was leaving he did come over to give me a hug though. Then, didn’t see him for a while.
Then, just recently, he showed up again, at a Sunset beach spikeball I organized. About 10, 12 people came. He said he’d be there, but I didn’t even recognize his name. When he came, I didn’t recognize him either. I thought, “Oh this guy is potentially cute, a lil bit.”
Then he started playing…and I saw the way he served….then I realized that he was that guy! I resumed my attraction towards him and would check him out once in a while.
Again he showed no sign of being interested in me. Though he made a software developer joke and it made me laugh so hard.
That was the day I ruined my socks at the Sunset beach because the sand was so rough! It was pretty funny when I discovered the giant holes in my socks….like my socks were 80% gone.
The next day, we played at Kits beach. Sid came again!
Nicole was there that day too, and that made me laugh extra hard.
Sid and I played the last game together. He has improved quite a bit. He is about the same level as me, sometimes better even! (I’m better sometimes!)
Then as everyone was leaving, he was biking home to the West End, and I was e-scootering home. I thought he’s just bike home, but he wanted to ride together, so we chatted. I couldn’t be more nonchalant when he suggested that we ride together. I don’t know why. But then when we started talking, I talked so much cuz I was nervous. I felt like I should’ve asked him some questions instead of just talking so much.
That night, I felt excited about someone for the first time in a long time. The clue was slight but I felt that the interest was mutual.
I even took a photo of BC Place when I got home and message him. But he never replied…. (I still don’t know what’s the deal with that…)
So Wednesday I played at the Sunset beach meetup playing on grass (I don’t think he came to that one), Thursday he came to the Sunset beach one I organized (playing on sand), Friday he came again to the Kits beach one even though it’s further away for him.
Saturday I practiced vollyball again the wall for like half an hour, and later that day, my back was starting to hurt like the spasm I had in the summer.
So I didn’t play for the next few days. Shane wanted to play on Tuesday, and Sid said he’d come, but it was rainy. Don’t they check the weather forecast??
Then on Saturday, I organized another one, at the Jonathan Rogers park. Very last minute, Sid said he’d come. I was a little excited. Spikeball is fun regardless, but, I liked him! I put a little bit more effort by putting on glitter sunscreen lol. I also wore pink.
Suraj gave me a ride. We laughed all the way to the park. We have fun. I have a feeling he is interested, but I’m not. I hope we can become very good friends though!
Then, someone said hi. I turned around and it was Sid! I smiled a big smile and opened my arms to give him a hug. The way he hugged me…oh my….I felt something. It felt like he put some feels into the hug. This was not a normal hug, not even like the one he gave me that first time…It was like he was enjoying the most of it….and I felt relaxed in his arms….and turned on.
He was a good height. Maybe 5’10? I thought he had a tiny belly, but when he hugged me his body felt pretty rock hard.
The rest of the day was a just super fun. He was playful! He’d tease me sometimes and I’d pretend to punch him. One time I think I punched him too hard and I had to apologize lol. Overall I was just so naturally touchy with him… I tried to not be too obvious about it, but I can’t help it.
He had this hops and ashwaganda sparkling drink and asked if anyone wanted to try it. He was standing right next to me so I think it was more like he was asking if I wanted to try it, and to be able to talk about how he got it at Tough Mudder.
Then he spent some time talking to everyone about Tough Mudder to try to gauge interest. Gosh I’d love to go….but first I have to explain my alopecia…
Towards the end of the day, Amy wanted to take a photo. I’m so glad she suggested that because now I have photos of me and Sid. I put my arms around him and Darren. But somehow we squeezed in more and he was in front of me and Darren was behind me. I basically draped myself over Sid in the pics, but we both looked pretty cute. Actually everyone looked really fun and happy.
When he showed us photos, I’d stand super close to him, my body touching his. I’m not normally like this lol.
At some point he stood really close to me too. It was like gravity.
At the same time, I felt that he was trying to seem like he wasn’t too into me. He’d seem interested in Amy and ask her questions, or he’d be paying compliments to Suraj, or he’d chat with others and almost try to not play with me. It’s hard to explain what that was about… I can feel his interest in me, but he is trying to not make it too obvious…maybe he is checking if I’m interested and if the other guys might hate him if he is too close to me.
I suppose if he was too obviously interested, it can come across as douchey or desperate?
I think he is skilled at attracting girls. You can’t be moving like that and hugging like that without some skills and experience. I bet he is good in bed too! I think he knows how to show just enough interest to leave the girl wanting more.
Oh and for some reason we got talking about our celebrity crush. I didn’t feel like saying anyone in particular, so I said I like abs. I probably should’ve said Chanin Tatum when he was in Step Up. Sid named some Cuban woman…she looked good but kinda boring. Suraj said Blake Lively because of her personality haha. I should say something like that next time. Chanin Tatum because he is funny.
Overall it was so much fun…I only wish he’d hug me again when we parted ways…but he was getting a ride from Darren and I was getting a ride from Suraj, and they just started walking away and said goodbye from far away…that was a bit weird.
When I got home he wrote in the group whatsapp how fun it was though. I posted 2 videos of the game (he was in them) and he hearted them.
There are so many things I love about Sid. I know no one is perfect, but….I’m grateful that in this moment, he is perfect, and he helps me get over Brian, and helps me feel excited about someone (about life) again! I’m savouring this moment, where he is still perfect, and he seems interested, and we are having fun, and I’m having a healthy crush on him.
I love that he is just the right amount of talkativeness and extroversion. He loves the idea of a community. He is playful! And funny! That’s soooo rare especially for a cute guy! He moves in a sexy way. He has nice body proportions, perfect height, beautiful light coloured eyes, cute smile, cute head shape, cute hair. I love how he wears his hat backwards…it just looks so cute on him.
I want him.
I’ve tried to imagine travelling around the world and going on flowriders with various guys I’ve been with – no one would fit. He fits. He seems like someone I can be with both solo and in a group.
Update:
Yesterday was the last day of Spikeball (Oct 11) before winter began. I like that I like spikeball enough that even if Sid wasn’t there it’s still super fun. But of course, I was hoping he’d show.
He wasn’t there, but while I was having fun playing, someone came over to say hi. I turned around and it was him! Omg! I gave him a big hug so quickly and enthusiastically like I hadn’t seen him in ages. I wonder if it was obvious to him and everyone else that I was into him haha
He hugged me back equally enthusiastically, and said he’ll be back. But then he never came back :'( Not sure what happened.
Thankfully I’m still quite healthily obsessed with him and I’m not too sad. A little bit though. I wish he had replied to my Whatsapp messages to him. We could’ve been talking a bunch by now! That’s another weird thing about him…how can he have missed my messages! But that’s ok. The Universe will decide I guess.
After it occurred to me that maybe he is around 15 years younger than me…I just felt that if I pursued him and we dated long term, it might not be fair to him. He seems too mentally healthy to hook up with someone 15 years older and doesn’t want kids. That’s a weird thought, isn’t it? Like I’m not giving myself credit for my worth.
I’m unusual! I’m timeless! I’m ageless! I’m energetically young – younger than most people who are chronologically younger than me. Except I’m also wise because I’m chronologically older. I’m smart, funny. We have common interests. We are possibly a great personality match. We have fun together. That should be enough. And if it wasn’t, it wouldn’t last and he can pursue a normal, average, boring person who wants kids and a mundane life lol.
Regardless of age….I’m only going to show interest, not going to chase him. He has to come to the conclusion that I’m amazing and worth chasing.
If only he was more consistent like Suraj. I think after I said to Suraj that it’s more fun when he’s at Spikeball, he reciprocated and more. He seems to either think of me as a closer friend now, or, he has developed a crush on me. I hope we stay great friends. It’s so much easier with him living close by and having money. We are talking about going to Vegas together to visit the Sphere! If only it was a trip with Sid. That would just be epic.
I think Nick, Pranav also have a crush on me. Ah well. I just want Sid.