I’m fed up with this friend.
Honestly she hasn’t been a good friend. She is never available to talk, and when we do talk, she is walking somewhere else.
I try to see it from her perspective. Maybe she is busy. Maybe she is just cut from a different cloth. In the end, I can’t relate.
There are things that make her very different from me. She cannot be alone. She said she is a loner sometimes. I’m pretty sure she isn’t.
She is ALWAYS going on dates. It’s to the point of ridiculousness. Mean while she is stringing a guy along….a guy that is good to her but she doesn’t find funny.
I used to think she is a sincere person, but she is losing that reputation.
She said she was sad and lonely around Christmas. I said, Do you want to skype? And she said, Yeah! And then she was not online on Xmas eve, or Xmas, or the next day or the day after that. By Monday, at work, she said, Oh I thought I replied (to me in google chat).
I feel like I already did my best, as a friend. I talked to her every week for 4 or 5 weeks, to make sure she set her goals and did them, such as sending resumes. I stopped after she found a job.
I am available when she calls. But we only really talked on the phone once. Recently she called, but she was absent minded and was obviously outside and had to go after 10 minutes.
I’ve tried chatting with her so that I can then ask if she is free and then call her. It seemed like she is always on the go, so calling her straight up wouldn’t work. But in reality, I never was able to chat with her long enough to ask if she wanted to hop on the phone. She is gone before then. Going on dates.
One time we did chat longer, and it was because she was on transit home.
It’s so sad that she treats me this way.
Perhaps she is desperate in finding a guy to marry and have kids with. Desperation is ugly on her.
Sum and I were going to go see her in January. Now, Sum is getting married in March, and has not time nor money to fly to NYC in Jan. I can still go, but I see now it’s not a good idea. I don’t want to be left alone in NYC lol. She just can’t spare any attention on me. Going with Sum, at least I’ll have company. And I’ll be less likely to get into a fight with Cyn. Going alone, no way.
So, scratch that plan. I have lots of work anyway.
I want to be confrontational, letting her know that she has been disappointing.
But experience tells me that being confrontational doesn’t work. No one wants to hear it.
How do I tell her that I won’t be visiting in Jan?
In April, I’ll be in China/Taiwan most likely, so I don’t think I can go to NYC then either.
How do you confront someone? I don’t think it’s a good idea any more.