Author: spacebunny@gmail.com

Unmotivated

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I have no drive today.

2 days ago I went to see The Hobbit with Norm. Found out that Norm had cheated on his ex-girlfriend for no good reason. On the way home some guy asked to borrow $15 for gas. I didn’t want to because I didn’t really trust him, but in the case that he might be honest, I didn’t want him to be stranded. So I lent it to him. It’s money that I can spare, but I was really hoping that he’d be honest. Yesterday, I texted him twice and I didn’t hear back from him. I guess he was lying. I’m so sick of these ugly people of the world.

I dunno if it’s these disappointments in humanity that killed my drive, or the fact that I’m not making money and it makes each day so unfulfilling. I know for sure that if I make thousands of dollars a day, like Matt Clark, plus that everything I touch turns to gold, plus so many people are grateful of my work and me being who I am – I’d wake up to each day with joy and enthusiasm.

I guess I’m working towards that. I wish that day comes soon. It seems to happen so fast for Matt. I really wish I were him.

He had a job for 7 months. Quit. He then started on Amazon, and that started doing well in less than a year I believe. So basically anything he does happens in less than a year or two. Knot Theory has been dragging along for almost 5 years now. I’m so old and so tired. I don’t know how to go on. I wish there’s something or someone to pull me out of this slump – both in how I feel and my financial state.

Norm Cheating

I went to see Hobbit 3 with Norm last night.

I was very upset to learn that he cheated on his last girlfriend. I tried not to be judging, but he did it while the relationship was good, and he did it just because he wanted variation in the bedroom – different body types etc. WTF. I resent that.

I really feel no respect for him. He is boring, but I thought at least he had integrity. But nope. I’m starting to wonder if he is a friend I should even keep. I don’t feel like helping him with his depression now. I think he is just stubborn. Most importantly, he has no compassion towards others if he cheats like that.

Dreaming lots

I seem to dream everyday now. At least, I seem to remember them now.

Nothing spectacular. The night before, I dreamt of having a fight with mom…I can’t remember what is was about now. Oh yeah, flower petals….she bought some flower petals and I can’t use them to make cards because they were really expensive. They were white, fragrant, and elegant petals. I went and bought a bouquet of colourful flowers and used their petals instead. I don’t like those dreams.

Last night I dreamt about Idriss writing me an email as a reply to an email titled “Counter Attack”. I think he said some friendly things. No matter. I’m just writing the above down in case they come true.

Last night I also dreamt of eating some sugar canes with dad. Dad asked me about my passion. I decided that my passion was not about a specific thing, like, scuba diving or fashion design, but instead, it’s about a certain type of experience. Can’t passion be that? It’s an interesting revelation for me. We always expect passion to be about an item. It could be a feeling, like liberation and freedom, seeing and experiencing new things, or thrill seeking.

I like this last dream the most 🙂

Cry a lot, white heads, better hydration

I cry a lot the past…year it seems. My body is probably going through some change. I’d cry when I sing a song, when I watch a touching youtube video, when I read a touching sentence on Facebook, when I watch Disney cartoon, etc etc. Why??? I think it’s hormone imbalance.

White heads. I have been having wheat almost everyday the past 2, 3 months. Small amounts, but almost everyday. It doesn’t seem to give me acne the way it used to, and I almost feel that I’m immune to it now. But these past few days , I notice that my chest acne feels more prominent. I picked at it, and now I have a big red acne between my boobs. Ugh. If only I can get rid of all these tiny bumps on my chest. Tiny whiteheads (even on my nipples), tiny subcutaneous cysts. When I have money, I really want to do something about them…

Yesterday was the first day in a long time that I made sure I drink 7 glasses of water. Today I’m better hydrated already. I can see it in my hands. I felt quite focused and productive yesterday too. I even got stuff gone late at night! I usually don’t have the stamina to do anything after 7pm.

I can’t tell if my puffy eyes are better. I do facial massages / slight exercises everyday, I can’t really tell if it’s working either. In the bathroom I look fine. Then I go outside and see myself in the elevator mirror or have an IMAX picture taken and I look old.

Started Neocell’s Blueberry Hyaluronic drink around January 1st, 2015. I think it helps a little bit with my joints. They feel more lubricated. We’ll see if it helps with skin too.

Tasks Accomplished Last Week Jan 5th ~ Jan 10th

I’m not on Facebook as much and I spending as much time eating this week, so that’s good. I’m in Vancouver (Burnaby) now, and that helps.

Moving here cost a lot of time. Packing, unpacking, driving, and adjusting to things – funny how it still takes time to adjust. But being here is so much better for me and my business and health.

I got some stuff done but next week I’ll get more done. I’m just getting into the groove of being here. No one cooks for me. I exercise more, etc.

I’m starting, just two days ago, to document my workout. Starting yesterday, I aim to drink 7 glasses of water a day. I’m starting to notice that I have puffy eyes, like Dad! Oh no!! At nearing 35, age is creeping up on me. I wish I’m ok with it but I’m not. I want to look young forever. I want to sleep with young boys forever.

This coming week I’ll go to the library everyday, like going to work. There’s internet there. I’ll get lots done that way. I’ll try to not have to work on the weekend. It’s more crowded then.

SEOD – I’m starting on it again. Gathered some contacts. Wrote a really good (I think) DSSL of my own. I just can’t do it the cheesy way that Rob does it.

ASM – The first sample ring looks pretty good! Finally. Of the three suppliers, 1 worked out, 1 didn’t, the other didn’t even produce anything yet. Now we need to produce the 2nd sample. That’s another 15 days. Sigh. But at least I have a promising supplier. Ring backing – designed. Shipping – got it pretty much understood by chatting with Amazon. Contacted L+.  Now I need to make sure that as a Canadian my stuff will come across the border ok. I’ll also have the 4 other sizes of ring drawings ready for Maggie so they can start as soon as the sample is ready. When production has begun and the shipping is sorted out, I’ll start on the card printing, complete the listings, go through the modules, and when the sample arrives, take pictures, build digital artifacts (web as part of knotheory.com, social media, emails for asking reviews, ). Once the production is done, I’ll have to remember to ask for 100 to 200 rings to ship to Canada so I can give them away here. There will be lots of tasks from the modules too I’m sure.

KT – This past week I was able to finally get Alice to make Duel 1 and some knots. Now all the ties will have knots. I still need to figure out what to do with KT to automate it more.

—

Jan 5th ~ Jan 10th

Think about how to automate some KT stuff so I don’t spend so much time on it.

Other

  1. Buy stuff for mom – waiting for Kuo Hua about pork blood rice cake availability.

  1. v Buy blueberries
  2. v Download workout youtube videos
  3. Get some vitamin and silicone tongues by Jan 18th
  4. Arrange to see Mom’s friends to deliver squash

ASM

  1. Have Amazon listing ready 3h
  2. v Decide on a supplier and finalize ring design
  3. v Filled out logistics form (Jan 10) – now wait to hear back!
  4. v ASM is top priority – figure out the 150 units per box thing- try start a shipping plan,and chat with help if avail.
    1. No limit. Only need to ship 3 boxes to 3 locations!

ASM – school work

  1. Listen to more of the course (Module 4? Module 5?) 4h (Fri)
  2. Get as much done as possible
  3. Go through Ezra’s notes again

SEOD

  1. v Make sure I get paid by Regency.
  2. Get one more blog post written
  3. See if anything can be automated more
  4. v Research on what field (in Victoria, Vancouver) to get more clients in 2h
  5. Listen to Rob’s course
  6. v Idea: Use catchy headline and content instead of DSSL!

KT

  1. v Email Kirk!
  2. v Email Patrick about embroidered bow tie taking a while
  3. Email ppl who want Duel 1
  4. v Alice – bring patterns, tie parts (green stripe, labels, fabrics), knot links
    1. make 25 black knots, 25 white knots, 5 royal blue knots, 5 duel one tie
  5. Bring Alice the blue fabrics when get a chance
  6. v Elena – bring Xmas fabrics, get bow tie boxes, pick up more bow ties, pick up more black tie cutouts, drop off bow tie boxes
  7. v Mail 2 orders
  8. v See Susan for Embroidery – Patrick’s bow tie
  9. v Update colour options for Hustle collection (next week)
  10. Add Knot combos to website
  11. Email Erica blog directions
  12.  G+ biz page set up and put blog on there
  13. Minimize overhead 
  14. What to do with KT from here on?
  15. v Sort out payment with Erica – she will let me know
  16. Research on bridal boutiques – how many in North America?
  17. Put the menswear mailing list in mail chimp (the list I got from Elancer)

Need to drink more water and document my workout

I woke up tired this morning. I dunno why. Workout from the day before? I’m starting to document my workout in a physical calendar in the hopes of seeing a pattern. I still like the quickness and clarity of a physical calendar.

I only drank 4 cups of water yesterday. Today? I dunno…less I think. I need to perhaps document that too.

 

Knot Theory optimization: What tasks are making money / saving me time?

There’s something wrong with the way I handle Knot Theory. I spend too much time on it. It’s time that I decide what is necessary and what is extra.

The past 2 months I have had to come to Vancouver 3 times. Granted once was for diving and twice was for my teeth, but still, I seem to spend way too much time on KT and none of that is making money.

1. I came here to get the embroidery machine.

2. I came here to get the fabric and to sew the knot

– fabric – didn’t have any in Vic. Elena has it.

– knots – no need to worry about it no more. Alice will sew some and when that is sold out, it’s done. I still have about 50 cufflinks though. Can make more knots.

– ties – tried to accommodate customers – ok for now since I still have the materials

– will list knot packs and the KT necktie with the knots

What tasks are making money / saving me time? 

Digestion, aging, health

1. I seem to be able to eat wheat without getting acne much….recent two months

2. I get bloated when I eat rice…..recent month

3. I fart a lot. Sometimes when I laugh…..more so now in the past two years. Increasing..oh no.

4. Probiotics a must these days….recent 6 months

5. Can go to bed after drinking water. Before I can’t lie down if I just had water….recent month

6. Never seem to have a flat stomach….not sure if it’s fat or gas or just sagging organs….recent 2 months

7. I don’t usually get stuffed. Better appetite than my friends.

 

Adrenal Fatigue and lack of focus

I have two major health concerns:

1. I can’t seem to focus. I need to check my mail, check facebook, etc even after just a short term focus. I drove past Elena’s place yesterday. I forget where I put stuff.

2. I get tired after coming home from outside. I get tired at the end of the day and can’t do much thinking.

Solutions:

I want to try meditation and deep breathing:

Mind And Body